By Harvey Deutschendorf
It has been frequently said that people don’t leave their jobs, they leave their bosses. Years ago, people were promoted based on their knowledge and skills with little thought given to their ability to develop strong relationships with others in order to work effectively with them. Whether you call them people skills, soft skills, emotional intelligence, the ability to communicate with, motivate and get the best from others around them has become a skill set that is increasingly being sought out for people who are in leadership positions. Hiring and developing this in leaders is crucial to the long-term success of any organization.
Here are 7 reasons for leaders to boost their emotional intelligence:
Increases Self-awareness
Being aware of our emotions, how they affect us and how we come across to others is crucial to building any healthy relationship. Strong leaders will continue to develop themselves, be open to feedback and can be vulnerable when it is called for. This increases their ability to connect with others, build trust and get the most from others around them.
Build Effective Relationships With Others
One of the most common reasons cited for why people leave their jobs is that they feel unappreciated. Personal bias, inflated egos and self-focus are areas that the most successful leaders work hard to overcome. Instead of taking things personally, emotionally intelligent leaders are able to see things from other’s perspective, allowing them to build the type of relationships that make people feel valued and appreciated.
Increases Communication and Listening Skills
Many people complain that they are not heard and listened to in their workplace. Feeling like we are being heard is critical to building strong working relationships with others. It is at the heart of our need to be valued and appreciated. In most conversations, the person listening is thinking of a response instead of really trying to understand where the other person is coming from. Strong leaders develop the ability to listen to those around them and let them know that they have been heard. While they may not agree with a colleague or employee, making them feel they have been heard lets them know their opinions and ideas are valued and appreciated. When speaking with others, leaders with high EI are aware of the impact of their words, tone of voice and body language on them.
Increased Empathy
The ability to understand and feel where others are coming from is one of the most important leadership skills. In every workplace people are constantly challenged by highly stressful situations both at work and outside. Death, illness in the family, divorce and relationship breakups and many other events have major impacts on our ability to function at work. Leaders strong in empathy are able to recognize and effectively navigate these situations that call for both caring for and supporting their people while at the same time ensuring that disruption at the organization is minimized. During difficult times, having strong empathic leaders can make the difference between a valued employee bonding more closely with the organization, or deciding that it is time to move on.
Builds Teamwork and Cooperation
Models Healthy Emotional Management
President of Judy Bell Consulting
Strong leaders act as lubricants to smooth out and overcome the inevitable conflict, strife and resistance that happens when a group of people have to work together towards a common goal. They look for opportunities to encourage and praise others in the organization for their successes. Even more importantly than how they react when things are going well, is how leaders respond when they aren’t. When things don’t work out as planned, leaders high in EI look for solutions and lessons that can be learned instead of apportioning blame. “Excellent leaders promote collaboration rather than unhealthy competition” says Judy Bell, President of Judy BellConsulting. http://judybellconsulting.com/ Collaboration and brainstorming as a team bring healthy solutions to problems and hurdles.
Leaders who are able to manage their emotions, set an example for the organization for what is appropriate, healthy and positive for the organization. Dr. Kathleen E. Allen, author of “Leading from the Roots” https://www.amazon.com/Kathleen-E.-Allen/e/B001K7VSPI, states “When a leader or an employee is not aware of their emotions and how they shape their behavior, they often behave in ways that drains the energy of others and wastes organizational time.” Leaders high in EI’s ability to connect and build positive relationships, will set a standard for others in their organization to emulate and work towards. This builds trust and creates a positive image of the company as a great place to work.
Articulates a Shared Vision for the Organization
A healthy workplace spends less time and energy on conflict, backstabbing and destructive politics, which frees up time and energy that can be used to work towards shared goals. Leaders who are able to articulate a vision that is shared by everyone will be spend more time on the work needed to grow the organization, rather than continuously putting out fires caused by infighting and disruption. When everyone is driven by a common shared cause, there is no need for micromanagement and close supervision. Employees will feel empowered to use their talents and gifts towards the united goal. “This is such an excellent point,” states Bell. “Infighting is such a waste of time and energy. This energy could be better used in actual productive ways to become better and stronger than the outside competition.”
Harvey Deutschendorf is an emotional intelligence expert, internationally published author and speaker. To take the EI Quiz go to theotherkindofsmart.com. His book THE OTHER KIND OF SMART, Simple Ways to Boost Your Emotional Intelligence for Greater Personal Effectiveness and Success has been published in 4 languages. Harvey writes for FAST COMPANY and has a monthly column with HRPROFESSIONALS MAGAZINE. You can follow him on Twitter @theeiguy.